England gently dips a toe here towards the Scilly Isles. The waves lap the rocks beneath the Minack Theatre. Seabirds wheel above. This is hardcore Cornwall and home to Porthcurno Retreat, welcoming up to 14 family and friends plus whole packs of beach-hungry dogs. Walk the cliffs, swim in crystal coves, laze by the pool.
Pool? Oh yes. Landscaped in Mediterranean planting, the seven-metre outdoor pool here comes heated to 28 degrees. Knock out a length or two, or just bob about, mulling over your crazy, lazy plans. Send your dog chasing driftwood at Sennen Cove, snorkel at pretty Penberth, or just watch the trawlers bring home their catch.
Wander the cobbles and harbours of Newlyn and Mousehole, dine out on fresh crab linguine, then come home to table football, table tennis and darts in the games room. Enjoy a board-game binge, tune in to cosy Netflix nights around the smart TV and prove it all happened with Instagram updates uploaded over the superfast BT broadband.
Half an acre of lawn and hedging draws the eye towards the glittering sea and the gems of Penberth Cove and Porthcurno Beach. Immediately outside the French doors, you’ve a glass-balustraded deck for dining and hanging out in the hot tub.
Get towels and trunks at the ready for the pool, landscaped Med-style and heated from April to October. Swim, sunbathe and savour special days high above the Cornish coast. End the day with banter, Beaujolais and a barbie around the firepit.
Tucked away in a tiny Cornish hamlet, you can almost taste the sense of escape and seclusion. That’s on top of the salty, sea-dog tang of the briny drifting over the clifftops. You’ll win on home comforts, too. This is a historic house, but there’s nothing ancient history about the pristine white interiors and modern sofas.
Fun’s also high on the agenda. You’ll want to waste an evening or two in the games room, vying for top dog over table football, table tennis, darts and board games. When the dust has settled, get together amicably around one of four TVs to enjoy Now TV, Amazon Prime Video or Netflix streamed over BT Superfast broadband.
It all starts rather nicely, with everyday essentials ready for you, plus a hamper of lovely local produce. Whip it all into shape yourself in the two electric fan ovens or hit the hot tub while our pro chefs, Jamie Oliver former 15 Apprentice of the Year Jordan Alan or gourmet chef Dave Sargent, prepare a one-off meal or fully catered break.
Shop at Lovett’s, Loaf bakery, St Buryan farm shop and the Tuesday Sennen farmers’ market. Eat together in the spacious dining room or out in the sunshine with meat on the gas barbecue. Treat yourself to takeaways from Pizza Roja in Sennen, Lewis Fish and Chips or Bo Thai.
Head out to The Tolcarne Inn for a lip-smacking menu that includes seared scallops, smoked aubergine, lime pickle, yoghurt and dukkah, or cod, monk’s beard, pancetta and mussel beurre blanc. Or try The Gurnard’s Head for pork belly, hake or aubergine Schnitzel, or the simple brasserie menu at The Old Coastguard.
Tuck into lobster, fish soup or deep-fried ray wing at Argoe. Enjoy tasting plates such as crab salad, crispy monkfish burger and mussels at the Mackerel Sky Seafood Bar. Get down to 2 Fore Street for the pork belly or a super-light souffle. Or for fantastic food at a great price with outdoor seating and a sea view, try The Orange Café Bar.
In a tiny Cornish hamlet close to the coastal cliffs, only the odd seabird will break the silence. Sleep like a lump of driftwood on 200-thread count Egyptian-cotton sheets in six lovely bedrooms.
On the second floor, with far-reaching views, the master bedroom offers a superking bed, TV, sofa and private shower room. There’s space for up to two cots. Bedroom two on the first floor is a twin plus double sofa bed. Enjoy a TV, private shower room and space for cots.
Bedrooms three and four provide a superking bed that converts to twins. You’ve an armchair and space for a cot, too. Bedroom five is a kingsize, while bedroom six is cosy with full size single bunk beds. An additional sofa bed, at a supplement, sleeps the final two guests.
British childhoods are built on holidays to Cornwall. Maybe breaking the journey with an overnight stay in Somerset. The drive down increasingly perilous, high-hedged lanes built for carts, to the very end of England. The curious placenames, quaint accents and cream teas. The steep cobbles and romantic beaches pounded by Atlantic surf.
You’ve memories to be made on site as well. Half an acre of grounds await exploration, with seagulls wheeling above and the land gently rolling away towards the promise of Sennen Cove and Penberth. Before you get there, of course, there’s a daily dip on offer in the seven-metre outdoor pool heated to 28 degrees between April and October.
Inside? If you’re not playing hide-and-seek, bring your binoculars for the top-floor master bedroom, with its lighthouse-style views. Stay indoors for the games room’s table tennis, table football and darts. Or with books, toys and board games in the playroom. Get together for movie nights on BT broadband-powered Amazon, Netflix and Now TV.
Older kids might prefer a dip in the fixed, six-seat hot tub out on the glass-railed deck. Towel off and stay out there to light the kindling on the firepit and make merry with the marshmallows while the sky does its starry stuff above. Plan another day of beach visits, pasties, castles, sails and seals.